post con lack of motivation

Honestly, conventions are exhausting.  If I still wore that dam FitBit it would have exploded.  Of course, all the driving I also did brought the fact that I need my wheel bearings checked to my attention.  I've had this problem before, it's no fun.  I drove that one until the wheel bearing gave out, that was...  and interesting drive.  Ever drive a car with a wobbly wheel?  I don't recommend it.  Scary.  So I'll get that dealt with in the next couple of weeks as it's still minor.  Of course, our mechanic retired and closed up shop so the joy of finding a new mechanic is overwhelming.  As a woman this experience can be extra super fun.

My work schedule is finally back to normal after three weeks of having to constantly remind myself what day of the week it was and which days I had to be at work.  It's a balm to my poor tired brain and coupled with the con exhaustion I'm finding it very hard to give a damn that there are three days worth of dishes in the sink, we're running out of clean underwear, and the fridge is empty.

I have a pretty long list for today...  almost an entire sheet of paper...  I had all the drive and motivation to do it last night, went to bed optimistic.  Went to bed with a game plan.

Overslept by ten minutes and once the boy was dropped off at school I promptly came home and did nothing.

I know damn well I'm using the excuse of the spousal unit's state of unconsciousness.
I'll get started when he gets up.
Besides, I'd like to run my errands first and I have no desire to back his car out of the driveway to unearth my own.

Let me finish this joint and I'll get my ass in gear...  or something.

who needs sleep

Confusion and forgetfulness.  Kinda awful.
I know there's depression and anxiety in there and to add the hormonal bullshit of dealing with the perimenopause is taking its toll on me.
Did I mention sleep?  I need so much more of it.
I recognize that I need to make changes in my life for the betterment of my health but who doesn't?  Getting more sleep as I get older is apparently part of that but it's really hard.  Part of why I don't get enough sleep is because I treasure my quiet  time in the evenings and I'm incredibly selfish.  In the moment I'd rather have an hour to watch a show or read.  Of course the next morning I'm irritated and wish I could get another hour of sleep.
I keep telling myself to stop, to get the sleep, the books and shows will be there tomorrow.
But then I remember that by doing so I'm the one who is making changes to my lifestyle in order to accommodate someone else because...  in all honesty...  at least 2/3 of the time I'd get an extra 20-40 minutes of sleep every night if my husband would get his fucking CPAP for his sleep apnea and stop snoring loud enough to rattle the windows.
Or he would rattle the windows if we hadn't had them replaced last week.
That was a busy, crazy day but it's so nice having decent windows that open smoothly, lock reliably and cut out more noise from outside.
Windows aside...  He would sleep a lot better as well and I wouldn't have to listen to him constantly bitching about how he didn't sleep and he's so tired.
I want to punch him every time he says he's tired.

This entire week has been bullshit and there's no point in laying it all out.  Scheduling, dealing with humanity, traffic, parental drama...  it's a story and-a-half and not very interesting.

Having to get up before the sun rose was not a pleasant experience.
I work a half day today, day five of seven days where six of them I have to work and three of them are spent at a convention.  After work I'll come home, get cleaned up, and drive 40 miles to the Con.  No idea how long I'll be there, but I'll be back tomorrow and Sunday as well...
I'm unexcited about the Con and would rather spend this afternoon and tomorrow home alone in bed.
At least my schedule reverts to normal after this.
Three weeks of a weird schedule have screwed with me.  I lost September and can't keep the days of the week straight.